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Andy Tross's avatar

Together, you and John Carter have given Peanut a eulogy for the ages.

Steve Northrop's avatar

The time4 has come to impress upon "the authorities", I am not impressed by your badge, gun, or piece of paper.

Resistance is NOT futile.

Thirty years ago, a dog that truly was my best friend was taken and killed because of my crime of not asking the city I lived in for permission and paying $13 for the privilege. Then they had the balls to send me a bill.

I try not to carry resentment, but that still stings. When asked what made me radical... that was the straw, so to speak.

Mark Bisone's avatar

Well said, brother.

Sorry to hear about your dog. God will take care of him in the interim, but we have work to do in the here and now.

Stefatanus's avatar

Only resentment?. I commend you on your forgiving nature sir.

Steve Northrop's avatar

Not so much forgiving though. The nosy SOB that started it all was walking down the road at around 1:40 AM one January night. I was coming home from out of town, about a nine hour drive, tired and not feeling much goodwill. It would have been so easy to bumper check him into the ditch full of snow.

I didn't, but I can't say I didn't want to. We've moved from that town to a much more live and let live part of the state. We look out for one another around here and don't butt in where we aren't wanted or needed.

Stefatanus's avatar

Restraint well handled. 👍🏻

John Henry Holliday, DDS's avatar

Requiescat in pace, Fred and Peanut.

The army assembles under a black flag to avenge your deaths and rides forth tomorrow morn.

Humdeedee's avatar

I haven't read John's eulogy yet but no doubt he will have a scathing take, as is yours, on this act of evil tyranny by "untalented, unlovable, lazy malcontents who infest New York State government...they are talentless, mindless parasites, lacking any purpose apart from obstruction and extraction." Man, can you craft scorn!

I sincerely hope that these envious nothings come to their end of life shunned and reviled, known only for the stain their lives left behind.

RIP Peanut and Fred. Gone but not forgotten.

Mark Bisone's avatar

John's eulogy is very John-esque (i.e. brilliant, militant and Martian). Highly recommend it.

When you are that dark and empty inside, I think it might take the hand of God to bring you back into the light. That is, of course, a possible outcome. But that doesn't mean we get to sit on the sidelines and wait. We must fight (and bite).

Jim in Alaska's avatar

Sitting here surrounded by spruce, I've no great love of my many neighboring tree rats, but this does increase my distrust, disgust and dislike of two legged badged , gun carrying vermin and all who support them.

Mark Bisone's avatar

Yep, the two-legged rats are the worst kind. And they don't even hide their own nuts (unless they're tucking 'em, or lopping 'em off).

Thumbnail Green's avatar

Yes I’m going to do the unthinkable and minimise the holocaust. Which I don’t mind doing since we have a continent’s worth of holocaust stories never told here in Australia. If you have read Milton Mayer’s book ‘They thought they were free - Germany 1933-1939’ you will see the banality of evil over every single aspect of this story.

You nailed it with the Brazil analogy

Stefatanus's avatar

I wonder what the Russians thought of Bolsheviks

Thumbnail Green's avatar

The ones with the best survival instincts ignored whatever they could and resisted what the were able.

Growing potatoes helps

Stefatanus's avatar

Bit hard to ignore being exterminated by your own government or alternatively being slaved to death in a Siberian gulag. Also, no potatoes allowed during the Holodomor

Fukitol's avatar

You might be surprised how many Russians cultivated illicit joy and sustenance under the noses of soviet commissars. Russia, like the US, is a big country, and the managerialist's reach always exceeds his grasp. Neither Christianity, nor love, joy, or trade was reintroduced to Russia following the fall of the soviet empire. It just reemerged from the hinterlands and blind alleys where it was hiding and waiting.

Thumbnail Green's avatar

I’m amazed at just how many subsistence dropouts live around Chernobyl completely unmolested. I’d go there.

Here in Oz I’ve gone to abandoned gold mining zone. Useless to others but apart from gov rates I’m unmolested too.

Fukitol's avatar

The US is 95% empty by landmass, and about 30% completely uninhabited. Plenty of places to get lost in, much of it habitable. There are people living in illegal homesteads on federal land *right now* and they only get caught when they're dumb enough to advertise it on the internet.

Back when it was illegal, much of the cannabis grown and sold in this country was similarly cultivated in state and federal land. At the height of their competence and power they couldn't keep said cannabis out of their prisons. Imagine how much luck they'd have destroying illegal potatoes now, in their advanced state of DEIcreptitude, with their scrawny jackboots terrified of stepping off concrete as they are.

We'll be fine if it comes to that. They talk mad shit about their weaponry and surveillance capabilities but the truth is they're the dumbest, laziest, fattest, slowest pissants to ever have attempted totalitarianism. People have to snitch on themselves to get caught for even the most serious of crimes here because their agents can't find an offense if it doesn't yield itself to a database search from the comfort of their cubicles. The bolsheviks were by comparison much more dangerous.

Thumbnail Green's avatar

True that. Im talking from here now as an early adopter but I am hoping we don’t go there. It’s why I follow US politics and social mood. They are our Hopium

Eric Brown's avatar

TBH, the White forces were just about as bad. Neither Whites nor Reds really gave a shit about the peasantry. It was a choice of oppressor, at best.

Kathleen Benson's avatar

An epic tale of good versus evil, love versus hate, joy versus misery for modern times. My husband was an arborist and we had multiple squirrels as pets over the years. They are beautiful affectionate creatures but only when there's just one of them do they really imprint on humans. Mr. Squirrel is still our favorite pet although we've had many wonderful cats over the years.

Mark Bisone's avatar

Certain kinds of animals easily transform in our presence. There are squirrels in a certain park I visit who are tame to the point of proxy-domestication. Very weird bunch. I always planned to write a children's story about them. Now, I definitely will.

PJ Buys's avatar

Mark, reading your article tonight out loud to my wife not only made us laugh out loud several times, but, even brought a tear to both of our eyes.

The little squirrels death (which, quite ironically, I have eaten squirrel on a farm before, I didn’t cry as much for the animal as the injustice to the good man raising him) has become a symbol for us all !

Love live, Peanut !

Mark Bisone's avatar

I have heard that squirrel meat can make for a good meal. But, of course, Peanut wasn't a squirrel anymore. He became something different in Longo's care. And now, as you say, he has transformed again, into a symbol for our deranged and decadent empire.

Jeff Cook-Coyle's avatar

Long love Peanut, indeed.

Halftrolling's avatar

The meme magic invoked here is even more potent than you realize, it happened right as no nut november started.

It appears that fate itself was on trumps side, as if his surviving the big assassination attempt didn’t convince us.

Annette Jordan's avatar

That "Karen" and all those of her ilk epitomize the banality of evil. I hope she and the judge both get flooded with the hate mail for their pointless black hearted cruelty that they so richly deserve.

Mark Bisone's avatar

Lasting opprobrium would at least provide a measure of justice. Losing their jobs and shuttering their entire "environmental law enforcement" operation would be even better.

Jeff Cook-Coyle's avatar

I wanted to write up a "noble, pure, and lovely" take on it. But you not only beat me to it-- you far surpassed my prospective essay. Viva la ardilla.

Mark Bisone's avatar

Thank you Jeff. Though I'd like to hear your take as well. The more the merrier.

Jeff Cook-Coyle's avatar

We have been poked in the eye so many times by The Regime. They may finally have gone too far.

Mark Bisone's avatar

That might be the case. And how genuinely hilarious would it be, if a little squirrel brought down an evil empire? Maybe we'd even wind up apologizing to George Lucas, for ridiculing his Ewoks.

Jeff Cook-Coyle's avatar

I don't know what you have done outside of your work as Mark Bisone, how well this fits, but this is a story waiting to be told.

Jaap STIJL's avatar

How surreal. Hopefully the victims will serve as reminders of the evil people are capable of, with their flawed, ordinary characters responding to the world around them with such weakness, fear, and self-interest rather than empathy and courage.

Mark Bisone's avatar

I think they will, actually. Just watched Joe Rogan and Elon Musk talk about the Peanut debacle for a good ten minutes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7qZl_5xHoBw&t=3419s

Thumbnail Green's avatar

Also this will spread it’s genius so here’s a typo “For five full house,” should be hours.

Also we have to rename from Black Swan event to Brown Squirrel now fuck!

Mark Bisone's avatar

Thanks for the save, Mr. Green. And yeah, Brown Squirrel Event has a nice ring to it.

Michael Carter's avatar

This is the pinnacle embodiment of the entire lunatic left. This is what their tortious, craven banality desires the most - the death of anything YOU enjoy or love, so you will be miserable just like them.

Made my blood boil, that and I haven't laughed so hard at memes in months.

Thoughtful's avatar

Love it. You have a gift.